My wife and I are white. We adopted our wonderful African American children at birth. We strive daily to help our son grow up to be a confident, proud and loving black man and our daughter to be a confident, proud and loving black woman. I hope our experiences will help others who are doing the same.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

"Borics can't cut a black man's hair."

"Borics can't cut a black man's hair,"  said Jacob as we left the shop after having asked the cutter to "line it" and she gave him a blank stare.  We had 45 minutes to get a cut during his lunch period so that he would look prim and proper on Thanksgiving.  The sit downs at Barber Love - an African American and Mexican American Barbershop that I've been taking Jake to since he was four years old -  were too many; so I figured we could get it trimmed at a commercial joint knowing they would leave it rough along the forehead.  I thought it was our lucky day when I saw an African American cutter come out of the back and head to the front.  I stood near the register eager to answer yes when she asked to if we wanted a cut.  To my chagrin she addressed a young white guy sitting in the corner when she said, "Next?"  Rats.  Instead of her, a middle aged white cutter came out and asked, "Next?"  Reluctantly, I stood our ground making sure she picked us and not the cute younger Chinese boy who came in immediately behind us.  We were under a strict time frame which was getting smaller by the minute.  The Chinese boy reminded me of the diversity of our great melting pot, and gave my hope a bump that Jake would come out with a decent cut.  As I waited a variety or people entered making the waiting area look like the Grand Central stop at 42nd and Lexington Avenue near the UN Headquarters. They couldn't all becoming just for the low price, surely some were here for the "do."  Though on closer inspection. . . 

Jake's cutter did a nice job, until he looked at her like something was wrong.  Seeing this, I stepped up to ask her to, "line it up."  That was when we met the stare.   I thought to myself look at all these people waiting, don't they all have cultural needs to their styles?  They can't all get the exact same hair cut.    Jake couldn't have been the first African American young man to make the wrong turn and open their door.  Comforting to us, she told us she'd "try her best."   Jake got out of the chair and we paid and tipped her - she did get it cut quickly - and left the shop.  That was when Jake made his observation, "Borics can't cut a black man's hair," to which he added that, "at least they didn't draw blood;" which sometimes happens at Barber Love's.

Later I relayed the story to another white father of an African American child and he said to me,"It's Borics they can't cut a white man's hair either."  To which I said," Perhaps Borics simply is the McDonalds of the hair cutting world?"  My friend simply responded, "Duh!"

The silver lining of this story is that Jacob knows what he likes in a cut and knows what looks good on him as a young African American man.  As a father looking around and seeing all the young white boys wearing their straight hair down to their shoulders, as if I were flipping through my own seventies photo album, and seeing many African American boys wearing Afros just like, Dwayne Nelson from What's Happening - (Hey! Hey ! Hey !), I am thankful Jacob has chosen the short and neat approach to style.  He tried a six month attempt at growing it out last year which resulted in his mother and Aunts and many of his friend's mothers saying how adorable he looked.  Soon after hearing this he abandoned it.

1 comment:

  1. Funny! I agree; hair is not a race issue so much as a cultural issue. The hair is different, and techniques for cutting it are different.

    ReplyDelete